PHIL IN THE BLANK: Fight the COVID

The COVID-19 novel coronavirus is causing an escalating avalanche of trouble for people around the world and here at home, with no clear end in sight.
For me, one thing that stings is the shuttering of Clarkston Village Players’ Depot Theatre, first by the CVP Board then pretty much by state executive order.
The community theater’s production of “Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Jersey Lilly” was cancelled with one weekend left to go, which I find sad for the cast and crew who worked so hard to bring the show to the stage.
Also, sad for theater aficionados who would have been in the audience, for missing a great play. Clever dialogue from everyone, especially Sherlock and Lilly. Lights and sound run by yours truly. It even had a sword fight.
Now I have to find other things to do. Plenty of that going around, with kids out of school until April, and much of the service industry shut down.
One thing I’ve seen people posting online – Tic-tac-toe games with their pets. Some of the cats get angry. Dogs seem confused. Fish just kind of swim away.
Tips from the state include stay home and avoid others if you’re sick or at risk of becoming sick. If you think you have been exposed to COVID-19, call the hospital. Symptoms include fever, cough and difficulty breathing.
Clean and disinfect frequently touched surfaces, such as doorknobs, keyboards, cell phones, and light switches. Reduce in-person gatherings and activities, especially for organizations with individuals at risk of severe illness. Not much of a choice left here, as state executive orders made gathering in groups of over 50 a misdemeanor crime.
Maintain a supply of medications, food, and other essentials in your house. People have been responding to this tip strangely. Shelves were still full of canned soup, vegetables, and meat, but the toilet paper aisles were completely bought out.
TP’s essential? The situation brings to mind an old Army joke/story I heard when I was in the service, about how to clean yourself after defecation using only one square of toilet paper. See, you fold it into quarters, then rip off one corner to make a hole in the middle. Keep the torn off corner. Then….
If you really want to know the rest, call or email me. It’s gross.

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