The term “ghosted” was added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2017, but I think we can all agree the act of being ghosted — or ghosting — existed long before that. Whether personally or professionally, being ghosted may be one of the most universally understood human experiences.
In case you’re somehow fortunate enough to not know what it means, officially the term “ghosting” describes the act of suddenly and unexpectedly ending communication with someone, especially electronically.
A Harvard Business Review article sites a 2018 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships that found that 25% of participants reported having been ghosted by a partner. When it comes to job seeking, 93% of respondents in a 2020 LinkedIn poll said they had been ghosted during an active hiring process. As a journalist I’ve certainly been ghosted by sources for a number of reasons, or sometimes for no reason at all. Talk to any sales professional, and I’d wager the majority have many tales of being ghosted by clients — both potential and current.
I’ve had a pretty good track record when it comes to not being ghosted by clients, but as spooky season arrives this fall, I’m in the midst a ghosting. While the irony of this client’s timing is not lost on me, it’s still not a great feeling. I consider this client a friend, and more importantly, I know that stopping the current marketing campaign as we enter the fourth quarter isn’t in the company’s best interest, so I hesitate to just “let it go.” Instead, I’ve been searching high and low for the best remedy to the situation.
From what I’ve gathered, even the best in the business cannot avoid this fate, so I didn’t have to look too far for advice. View Newspaper Group Publisher Wes Smith suggested that I print a hard copy of my latest email correspondence and drop it off to the client, which I have now done along with a big bag of Halloween candy (I’m not above bribery). While I was hoping to have a resolution to share with readers by the time this column published, I do not. Maybe my client is also a Building Brands reader and will feel compelled to reach out.
In the meantime, I thought I’d turn this pain point into a learning opportunity for us all by seeking help from another expert Ryan Dohrn. Dohrn is a well-known sales professional and speaker who tackles a wide range of topics, including ghosting.
In a video on the topic, Dohrn answers a viewer who writes “I’m getting ghosted all the time … I have great meetings. People seem really interested, and then they completely go dark.”
There are a number of things that can lead to being ghosted by a client. Dohrn suggests one reason a sales professional may be ghosted is that “you’re too nice,” and people don’t like to say “no” to a nice person. I’m not sure that applies in my current case, but luckily it doesn’t matter, because Dohrn has a way around this pitfall and pretty much any other reason a client may ghost you (budget, timing, priorities). In fact, he has laid out three key steps to prevent ghosting, including:
End each encounter with a yes, no, maybe plan: At the end of each pitch give three options: Yes (approval of the pitch); No (Despite old school sales training models that don’t allow a sales person to accept a “no,” Dohrn says it’s OK to leave room for a “no” as long as you express you’ll be disappointed, but respect the decision) or Maybe (offer the client time to review and think about the pitch, and set a time to follow up).
Plan to miss each other: Everyone is busy, and it’s possible that you’ll miss your client on a follow up. Plan for this by asking “If I miss you when I reach out for a follow up, do you prefer another call, an email, a text or an in-person visit?”
Have a strategy: While I’d love to think I’m the kind of person who can find success by “winging” it, that’s rare. As Dohrn says, sales professionals without a plan do OK, sales professionals who have a strategy for everything they do, kill it. Personally, I’d like to be killing it. If I haven’t heard from my client in a week, it’s clearly time to go back to the drawing board for a new strategy.
How do you handle being ghosted by a client? Email me at ecaswell@mihomepaper.com.

Emily Caswell is the Brand Manager for VIEW Group, the branding division of View Newspaper Group.