Where there’s a will there’s a way (scam)

Call me kooky, but I am either just really cynical or I’m stupid and have blown countless opportunities to make millions.
Since I don’t believe I’m a cynical old fart, I must be stupid. At this very moment, if only I had acted, my family could have been set for life. We could be living large in a big house with a cement pond out back. I reckon if I wait around long enough, and answer enough faxes here at work, I’ll have another opportunity to make my millions.
I’ll have to watch that work fax machine like a hawk, lest some fellow worker swipe the fax and its millions in US cash out from under my feet. What am I talking about?
Let me tell you. Two or three times a year we get these faxes, faxes from wealthy men in Africa. The amount of letters we receive from rich African men would lead me to believe they could help their continent’s debt problem, if only they acted. Alas, they’re trying to get the cash out of Dodge.
Here’s an example of the latest letter:
‘I want you to patiently read this offer. I am Prof. Paul Azika the special assistant to the Minister of Petroleum and Natural Resources in Nigeria. I am the linkman between the Organization For Petroleum Exporting Countries – OPEC and the petroleum sector in Nigeria.
‘Through the sale of our allocated oil quota in OPEC, I was able to make US $22.2million, which is currently deposited in a European Security and Finance company. I want you to assist me to claim this money as I cannot claim it directly because I am still a civil servant, and the code of conduct bureau forbids me to acquire such an amount of money.
‘It is on this basis that I am contacting you for assistance. If you will be interested, all you will do is to travel to the European nation after all official claim documents have been processed and sent to you. The documents with which the fund is deposited will be changed to reflect you as the new beneficiary so that you will be eligible to collect the fund on my behalf.
‘I will give you 20% of the fund for this assistance. I am aware of the international monitoring of all large-scale financial movements after the September 11th terrorist attack on America and to avoid any state of financial investigation I will provide a classified clearance paper from the relevant body which will exonerate the money from either drug, money laundered or terrorist related proceeds.
‘Kindly respond to my proposal through this email: ______ or Efax number_____. on the receipt of your mail indicating interest I will provide you with my phone and fax numbers for further correspondence. I want to assure you that there is no risk attached in this transaction. You should also try to provide me your own personal telephone and fax numbers. Expecting your response.
Best regards,
PROF. PAUL AZIKA?
* * *
Maybe I really am a cynical old fart, ‘cuz that’s just too good to be true. How can I say it nicely? FOR GOD’S SAKE PEOPLE IT’S A FRACKIN? SCHMACKIN? SCAM!
If we’re getting these scam letters, so are other businesses. And, hard as it may to believe, gullible businessmen right here in our state have fallen prey. They have believed the letter, sent money, their bank account numbers, etc., banking on easy money only to be scammed out of thousands (sometimes more) of dollars.
Can you help stop these scammers? You can call the FBI (248-879-6090 in Oakland County), but they’ll tell you to call the US Secret Service in Detroit (313-226-6400), as they did me, when I called.
Is this one way terrorist organizations bulk up their war chests? Or is it just an old fashioned flimflam? Don’t know, but I am sure the gals and guys at the Secret Service office would like to see those letters. Fax the scam letters to them at 313-226-3952.
E-mail your thoughts to Don at: dontrusmedon@aol.com

Interesting — on June 5, 2002 we started getting scam emails… I wrote about it then (which you’ll read) and guess what — we get more now. Ain’t life grand?

Call me kooky, but I am either just really cynical or I’m stupid and have blown countless opportunities to make millions.
Since I don’t believe I’m a cynical old fart, I must be stupid. At this very moment, if only I had acted, my family could have been set for life. We could be living large in a big house with a cement pond out back. I reckon if I wait around long enough, and answer enough faxes here at work, I’ll have another opportunity to make my millions.
I’ll have to watch that work fax machine like a hawk, lest some fellow worker swipe the fax and its millions in US cash out from under my feet. What am I talking about?
Let me tell you. Two or three times a year we get these faxes, faxes from wealthy men in Africa. The amount of letters we receive from rich African men would lead me to believe they could help their continent’s debt problem, if only they acted. Alas, they’re trying to get the cash out of Dodge.
Here’s an example of the latest letter:
‘I want you to patiently read this offer. I am Prof. Paul Azika the special assistant to the Minister of Petroleum and Natural Resources in Nigeria. I am the linkman between the Organization For Petroleum Exporting Countries – OPEC and the petroleum sector in Nigeria.
‘Through the sale of our allocated oil quota in OPEC, I was able to make US $22.2million, which is currently deposited in a European Security and Finance company. I want you to assist me to claim this money as I cannot claim it directly because I am still a civil servant, and the code of conduct bureau forbids me to acquire such an amount of money.
‘It is on this basis that I am contacting you for assistance. If you will be interested, all you will do is to travel to the European nation after all official claim documents have been processed and sent to you. The documents with which the fund is deposited will be changed to reflect you as the new beneficiary so that you will be eligible to collect the fund on my behalf.
‘I will give you 20% of the fund for this assistance. I am aware of the international monitoring of all large-scale financial movements after the September 11th terrorist attack on America and to avoid any state of financial investigation I will provide a classified clearance paper from the relevant body which will exonerate the money from either drug, money laundered or terrorist related proceeds.
‘Kindly respond to my proposal through this email: ______ or Efax number_____. on the receipt of your mail indicating interest I will provide you with my phone and fax numbers for further correspondence. I want to assure you that there is no risk attached in this transaction. You should also try to provide me your own personal telephone and fax numbers. Expecting your response.
Best regards,
PROF. PAUL AZIKA?
* * *
Maybe I really am a cynical old fart, ‘cuz that’s just too good to be true. How can I say it nicely? FOR GOD’S SAKE PEOPLE IT’S A FRACKIN? SCHMACKIN? SCAM!
If we’re getting these scam letters, so are other businesses. And, hard as it may to believe, gullible businessmen right here in our state have fallen prey. They have believed the letter, sent money, their bank account numbers, etc., banking on easy money only to be scammed out of thousands (sometimes more) of dollars.
Can you help stop these scammers? You can call the FBI (248-879-6090 in Oakland County), but they’ll tell you to call the US Secret Service in Detroit (313-226-6400), as they did me, when I called.
Is this one way terrorist organizations bulk up their war chests? Or is it just an old fashioned flimflam? Don’t know, but I am sure the gals and guys at the Secret Service office would like to see those letters. Fax the scam letters to them at 313-226-3952.
* * *
The good eye doctor, Ted Walton of Oxford, read about my eyes getting lasered. Doc said he is much more comfortable with current laser technology/eye surgery than in the days of RK surgery.
‘RK surgery was a technique and techniques had no set standards. Technology for laser surgery can be approved by the FDA. The FDA is the world’s benchmark. If something is approved by the FDA, more than likely it’s safe,? he said.
Doc Walton consults his patients about laser eye surgery, pros, cons and what to expect. Any questions, give him a call at 628-3441.
Comments for the cynic, Don, can be e-mailed to: dontrushmedon@charter.net