When was the last time you went on a first date?
Maybe it was recently or maybe it was decades ago, but either way, they are all pretty much the same – weird.
Now this doesn’t necessarily mean bad as I’m sure we have all heard the horror stories of disastrous first dates. Creepy guys or chatty girls or even those awkward encounters when your date doesn’t look quite like their profile pic suggested. Even when first dates go well, they are filled with just bizarre moments and thoughts.
What are we going to do? Where are we going to go? These two first questions can mean a lot on a first date. You want to do something fun that creates a little bit of a conversational atmosphere, but nothing too busy like bowling where one side of the party is always occupied.
Once you decide on dinner at a casual sit-down restaurant, your mind begins to race, contemplating every other detail.
What will I wear? Hat or no hat? Should I shave my face or keep the goatee? After showering, trimming your face and making your ‘do look somewhat presentable, you slather on an extra layer of deodorant, then another. Give 2-3 spritz of cologne, and after one last look in the mirror, you head out the door.
You begin your drive to her place, air blasting as you are already sweating profusely as your hands slip and slide along the steering wheel. You arrive and can’t decide if you should go up to the door and risk meeting her parents prematurely or just let her know you are here.
Finally, before you decide, you see the front door open as you sit there dumbfounded. She’s beautiful, but you can’t talk to looks alone, so you begin talking, likely too much.
Hopefully, you’re lucky and she thinks it’s cute rather than annoying, and you flirt and connect all night getting sneak peeks into each other’s personalities.
As you both get more comfortable, you hesitate to make a first move, but the night comes to a close and her front porch gets bigger. The small talk continues as you walk her up.
You awkwardly lean in, praying she does, too, then in one instance the slimy hands, nervous stomach and unsure outfit becomes all worth it.
— Jack Mueller